Altared From the Inside Out.

Romans 12:1-2
Therefore I urge you brothers, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God-- that is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern of the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-- his good, pleasing, and perfect will.

This past week God gave me an opportunity of a lifetime.  He blessed me with chance to change myself, as well as enabled me to assist many junior high students in changing theirs. Being down in a canyon with 200 people on fire for God, no cell phone reception, no distractions, and the presence of God is something you really can't describe in words. In fact, it's nearly impossible.  I did find out through the journey though that one week is all it took for my life to be changed from the inside out.

Before I left for camp... I was a little nervous because this year, I was attending camp as a leader instead of a camper. Not only was I nervous because I didn't know what to expect, but I was also a little hesitant about leading a bunch of 7th graders through the curriculum.  I had decided before I left that I was going to make the best out of any situation and try my best to not hold back.  I knew I'd regret it later if I didn't listen to God's will and try to lead students on the right, spiritual path.

The beginning of the week started off a little like I had worried about.  I was nervous, the kids were quiet, and I wasn't too sure I knew what I was doing.  Monday night, I prayed long and hard for God to give me the confidence and courage to start over on Tuesday.  The next day, my whole experience turned around. Now, it could have been the fact that it was Tie-Tye dye-Tutu-Tuesday, but I'm pretty sure it was the power of God working through me.  My small group started to warm up to each other, my partner, and to me by the end of the day, which made the experience that much better.

There were so many great things about last week that I'd love to share, but I'd be writing a novel.  Between the non-stop laughing in my small group, to watching the kids battle it out in volleyball, to them trying to figure out how to get from one plank to another on the low ropes, to watching the Spirit work through them in worship... it was an awesome week. All of these things were just a few of the things that showed me why God had called me there.  Not only were the kids amazing, but so were the staff. We all got along so great and brought out the best in one another. It was so great to know we were all there for a reason and understood that God was working through us.

Needless to say, I learned a lot about myself, but I learned more about what junior high students face in today's day and age. I received the chance to relate to many of the students and be an ear for them to talk to.  It was by far one of the most rewarding things I've ever done and taught me what is truly important in this life.  I met so many amazing kids that have so much going for them if they keep their eyes on the real prize and be blessings to others just as they were to me.

I was truly changed last week from the inside out. I know that kife is truly slipping by one day at a time and it's up to us to be the real change we wish to see in the world. Our children are the next generation and if they aren't well equipped for what they'll face, how will they cope? How will they know there is a God that loves them and there is more to the materialistic things the world shows them?  I believe that it is becoming harder and harder for students to live a life for Christ. By taking a week out of my somewhat busy schedule to be an example and leader for them, I'm making a positive difference in their lives, as well as my own.

My God is Greater. My God is Stronger. My God is a God Who Saves. <3

In the Blink of an Eye.

So, four more days of class and four tests and I'll be done with my first year in college.  Is that not crazy?! I'll answer that question...it is beyond crazy!  Last year at this time, I was worrying about my Senior Prom, sending out graduation announcements, and anticipating the big night. I was so wrapped up in everything and so excited about gaining a new sense of freedom that I wasn't even thinking of all the changes that would enter my life. Needless to say, the night of graduation, it hit me: I'm growing up and NOTHING is going to be the same after this moment.

And I was right... nothing has been the same.  There was a part of me way back in August that didn't even want to go to college. All I wanted was to stay where I knew what to expect and somewhere I was safe.  When I got to college, my view on the whole situation still hadn't changed.  I was excited for something new but I knew absolutely nothing, I was on my own, and I didn't know what to expect.  It was a rough couple of months.  My car (which I got for graduation and loved dearly) got hit and crushed forever, I had a four wheeler wreck with my dad, and my classes weren't the easiest.  I cried often (okay, maybe a lot) and I questioned myself on what I really wanted out of my college experience.

I would love to say that it was just a phase and I got over it in no time, but it really did take awhile to adjust.  By Christmas time, I still wasn't 100% I wanted to go back, but I did.  I knew that I needed to make the best of my year.  I became very passionate about children with disabilities and decided to declare my major.  I also became more involved with the Christian organization I was in last semester, but I started to put myself out there and participate in more activities.  I also found a much needed friend who just so happens to be my roommate next year in our new HOUSE! Not to mention, I was chosen to be a SPUR for next year's OSU basketball season.  It's all quite exciting and happened so quick.  Never in a million years would I have thought all of that could happen in a few months time. 

I have changed a lot since the beginning of the year.  Not that I've changed who I am, I've just rediscovered what is important to me and I'm very happy with what I found.  Even though this year is ending, I know that the summer will present me with even more challenges that will shape me into the woman God wants me to be. I'm even sort of sad to be leaving this tiny, undecorated, kind of smelly, almost unbearable, dorm life with my roomies.

God has done amazing things with me this year and I am truly blessed beyond belief.  He has placed people in it that I don't deserve and given me too many opportunities to turn my year around.  I'm happy to be done with school soon and for summer to start.  It'll be nice to get away and do my own thing without assignments and tests being shoved down my throat. 

I'll continue to blog during the summer, though I highly doubt I'll have as much to say.  Hopefully, my blogs are an inspiration to someone and they bring smiles to faces... I know they do to me.  For now, it's off to practice my speech for my presentation tomorrow (if you're reading this, say a little prayer please).

<3

Believing in Something Bigger..

To my girls who have been reaching their goals and making great things happen, this blog is for you...

You all sure have been making a run for it.  Not only have you made it farther than anyone expected you to, but you've made it to the big enchilada... the STATE TOURNAMENT.  I'm happy for you all because last year we made it so close but fell short. I knew that it would be hard to watch you all play for something we all wanted so bad last year, but now it is your chance to shine bright. This means so much to me because I wanted it so bad last year for us, but now I want nothing more for you all to get it this year.  I know that you girls can do it if you just believe in yourselves and play harder than you ever have before.  Playing in the Big House is something so special and it is every Oklahoma high school basketball player's dream. This has been your goal from the moment you started practicing, so go get it. There is no one team that can stop you if you play your game.  Anyone can be beat on any given night, in any given gym (cough Pawnee at SNU cough)  I wish only the best for you girls and can't wait until Thursday to watch you beat some Pawnee butt.  Believe in yourselves, trust in each other, and just go have fun.  Don't forget to enjoy it while it lasts and prove all those people who think you can't do it wrong! If you want to hear..."It's Championship Saturday and you've made it to the Big House," bad enough, you'll go do whatever it takes to win that beautiful Gold Ball!! Do it to it ladies!! :)

Make Grandma Paige proud and go win it all. Not only am I writing you all your own personal blog, but I'll be supplying you with my game day text on Thursday so no worries there! ;) I'm your biggest fan and don't doubt for a second I won't be yelling at you from the stands. I love you all so much and wish you the best of luck on your quest for that Gold Ball.

LJKA! :)

Family is Forever

As I was driving home, as in Fairview home, it slightly dawned on me that my days with my family are limited. Now, I don't mean to say limited as in I'm going to die soon (Well, I hope not at least) but limited in the fact that the things in and around my family aren't going to be the same today as they were yesterday.  I have realized since I went to college that even though I'm an hour and a half away, life still goes on here at the homestead.  Nevertheless, I guess I am going on and doing things on my own as well, it's just weird that I'm not as connected as I used to be.

Last semester, I really liked being able to come home. I counted down the days until I could get the heck out of Stilly and I always dreaded leaving to go back on Sundays. I had a lot of my friends, in high school and in college, that didn't really agree with me visiting home so often.  They would tell me I needed to branch out, break away, only visit two or three times a semester, or not go home at all.  At times, they really got to me.  I was so afraid that people would view me as "stuck in high school", a "homebody", or "unable to let go of the past".  I cared so much what people thought about me that it tore me down.  I would feel ashamed for wanting to go home and seeing the people I loved and missed the most.

It wasn't until the end of the semester that it really hit me:  It's my life, why am I letting others define it?  I decided to let go of what others were saying about me and live my life the way God intended me to live it.  I prayed about it so much that I think God was saying, "Paige, I've already figured this out...why can't you see it too?"  I did see it though, it just took me a little longer than I would have liked it to.  I decided that I wasn't going to let what others had to say get to me.  I was coming home and seeing my friends and family becauseit was what I wanted to do.  How could I not miss people who were such a big part of my life?  Picking up all of my belongings, relationships, and living in a whole new world and lifestyle was extremely hard for me.

So yes, I am home this weekend. For all of you people out there that think that's ridiculous, how about you quit worrying about others and worry about yourself.  Everyone grows and develops differently. Some students don't come home because they don't have a strong relationship with their families, don't want to deal with what comes along with the visit, or because they have decided to leave their families out of their "new" life.  For me, family is everything. Since I have a sister still in high school, parents who are very involved in the community, as well as my grandparents living in the same town, it's important for me to visit and stay in touch with them.  By saying that, I hope to get across that everyone deals with situations differently and it's not right of someone to judge another.

I'm excited about my life and where God is going to put me.  I do know though that my family will play a huge part in my life.  No matter how busy I become or what comes up in my life, I will never forget my family.  As I've learned through life, friends and boys come and go, but family is always forever.  Whatever the circumstance, my family will stick by me through thick and thin.  I am so thankful for them and I try to tell them often I love them.  I'm fine with coming home and visiting because it's something important to my future success.  So I'm simply living my life the way God and I have intended it and am not letting others get to me, no matter how hard they try.

This is What Dreams Are Made of...

"Keep your dreams alive. Understand to achieve anything requires faith and belief in yourself, vision, hard work, and determination.  Remember all things are possible for those who believe."

If you read that quote closely, you'll see how much truth that it holds.  Keeping your dreams alive and important is so critical if you hope to achieve them.  Sometimes it's hard to have goals or dreams and stick to them because it's easy to get lost along the journey and see those dreams die out.

No one ever wants to see a person's dream fade away, but unfortunately, it happens each and everyday to someone around the world.  They lose hope in something they had their heart set on and give up.  With all the dreams and goals I have set for myself, it's hard to imagine not achieving some of them.  I know as well though that at any given moment, anything can happen and my plans could get pulled out from under me.  I think the best way to ensure that your dreams and goals are achieved are exactly as the quote said, by believing in yourself, working extremely hard, and having a deep determination to accomplishing what you truly want.

I know that when I played basketball in high school, we always made goals for ourselves as a team.  We would write down what we wanted to accomplish or win and keep those goals posted so that we were reminded of them every day.  Sometimes, things didn't go as we had planned and hoped, but we pushed forward and did our very best.  My senior year was a rough year because we had a player down and we were extremely close to going to the place every basketball player dreams of:  The Big House.  Losing my last game was one of the hardest things I've come to face, but even though I failed to reach one of my goals, it wasn't going to stop me from dreaming up even more goals I could try to accomplish.

My sister is now a sophomore and she is on the same team as I played on last year. At the beginning of the season, everyone knew that they were going to make it to the Big House and have a high possibility of winning the gold ball. Unfortunately, they have also encountered some serious hardships this season as well, but it's nothing that they can't overcome.  They all have a dream to go to the Big House and win that gold ball, but because they have had some bad luck, doesn't mean their dream is impossible.  I know that they want this bad enough that they won't give up.  Not only are they playing to win for themselves, but they are playing for their teammate who wishes more than anything, she was out there too.  I believe in my Lady Jackets with all my heart.  If they believe in themselves, in their dreams, and work hard everyday, they are going to get to that Big House and I'll be sitting in the stands when that announcer announces, "It's championship Saturday and you have made it to the Big House."

I know a lot of people that are dreaming big and hoping to achieve their goals.  Some have smaller dreams, such as receiving straight A's, graduating school, or getting over a fear, but some are dreaming bigger by wanting to explore the world, win a gold ball, or even make it on a hit TV show.  No matter how big, how small, how difficult, or how impossible a dream might seem, anything can happen and be accomplished by believing in the dream as well as yourself.  Nothing is impossible if you just believe.

So to my Lady J's as playoffs start soon (LJKA) and to my favorite group of boys that have a huge dream, good luck these upcoming weeks.  I believe in you and I know that you all can do it! I'll definitely be praying for you. :)

One of These Days..

Life is full of surprises. Some that are good and others you'd wish you could forget.  God has granted me a ton of blessings so far in this life. He's given me friends and family who love me, given me the privilege of going to college, and has placed a roof over my head so that I have a nice, warm place to live.  So why at times do I complain that I don't have everything I need? Isn't He enough?

A lot of times in life I find myself wanting more, whether it be more clothes, more money, more friends, or even on a more personal level, a man by my side.  Are those too much to ask for?  Well at times, I don't think they are, but in all actuality, they really don't matter at all. All we truly need in life is to accept Jesus as our Lord and make disciples.  We don't need all these material things such as clothes, money, or the nicest house or car. Those things aren't going to matter on the day we leave this earth and meet our Father in heaven.  All of those things will simply sit where we left them and rot away, get old, and become worthless.

I am definitely one of those people that like to have nice things and spend a lot of money on material things. But I also understand that in the long run, those things don't define who I am or what I'm going to do with my life. One thing I can't buy or control though, is the person that I fall in love with.  Now, I'm not one of those girls who thinks that having a man in my life will complete me, but I do get lonely at times. It's hard to understand that God has a plan for me and even though I have no clue who Mr. Right is for me, He does, and is going to make it happen.

Sometimes though, I'm worried that I am going to be alone for the rest of my life. I have seen and met so many beautiful women who are in their mid 20's and even late 30's who aren't in love and haven't been given the chance to start a family.  Even though they struggle with the fact that they have never been married or found a man to love them, they still have a positive outlook on their lives and know that God still has a plan for them, it's just taking their plan a little longer to get started.  After hearing their stories, I'm not so scared about someone never falling in love with me or never getting to start a family, it's God's plan, not mine.

One day though, I hope that God has a man planned out for me who will love me for me, who can be my best friend, and who will want to give me little children to call our own.  Being in college and seeing so many of my friends happy and many of them getting married, it's hard not to want the same thing.  I'm being a patient person and trying to follow my heart.  One day, I'll be blessed with a man that I can call my own and when that day comes, it won't be about me anymore, it'll be about us. Material things won't matter and owning the best of everything will be history.

I can't wait for the surprises that God has in my near future, but for now, He is enough for me. I'm trying to stay positive and live life to the fullest, because you never know what tomorrow will bring. Tell people you love them, give your family hugs, and say the things you need to say, because tomorrow might just be too late.

Snow, Snow, Snow...

Oh, what a beautiful day it is here in Stillwater, Oklahoma...well, sort of.  It's been snowing for well over 12 hours now.  Usually snow is beautiful, but today, it isn't what I'd call an idealistic snowfall. 

Since school was cancelled today, some girls came over last night and we had quite the sleepover in our living room.  We ate too much, watched movies, and of course, carried on several conversations, some very girly, I'll admit it.  Recently, they decided to trek back across campus to their dorms. They soon figured out that that wasn't the smartest idea they've ever had. They videoed themselves walking back and there was a lot of screaming and crying involved. I felt really bad that they had to endure the harsh conditions, but they were determined to make it back!

I love snow days, but come, oh, two o'clock in the afternoon, being cooped up in a dorm room gets extremely boring.  Being the bright college students that me and my roomates are, we didn't prepare for the storm by buying board games, cards, or renting movies, but instead, we bought junk food.  I will say though that the main reason we didn't go buy things to entertain us was because for some odd reason, the entire country decided to freak out over snow and bought the stores out of everything.  A bit ridiculous don't you think people? Unfortunately, we are slowly realizing that the junk food was a BAD idea and that we should have been more creative in thinking of different things to do on a nasty, cold, snowy day.

Here are some pictures that I took out of my window this morning when I woke up.  We were all really surprised at how much snow actually had come over the course of the evening.  Usually those news men like to exagerate the truth a bit.  In all, we're now anxiously awaiting to see if the university will be closing campus again tomorrow... Until then, my computer shall be my saving grace.

It's a winter wonderland!!